Tonya-Holcomb-sitting-outside-with-hands-together-in-gratitudeOh, fear.

I naively thought that once I made peace with my fear in 2016, I was good for life.

But fear is inside of us. It’s a part of our egos that we cannot live without. We need our egos to keep us safe when we’re in true life-or-death situations.

On a daily basis of living, most of us allow fear to drive our decisions. We find ourselves tip-toeing through life, just to get to death. And as I’ve newly transitioned from my comfortable corporate job to fully honoring my soul assignment — which means stepping into unknown territories and putting my work out into the world in a big way — my fear is in constant communication with me.

In fact, my ego is so uncomfortable right now that if I were to allow it, it would gladly take the driver’s wheel back from my soul and lock me in a safe, “known,” comfort zone.

Even little things are triggering my ego, like an old friend deleting me on Facebook or a few followers unsubscribing from my emails. Fear’s response is, “See… this is what I’ve been trying to tell you… it’s all just too scary… the more authentic you are, the more you put yourself out there, the more chances and risks you take of not being liked!” Vulnerability is terrifying to the ego.  And, let’s face it, the ego loves to be loved! Our ego deserves a seat at the table because we need it to protect us from true danger and help shape our boundaries. But you must remember that it plays on our self-doubts, old programming and limited beliefs.

These triggers, no matter how minor, have a funny way of accumulating in the body. So they must be addressed immediately. When fear is triggered, you must train your brain to have a knee-jerk response of gratitude. It literally has the power to instantly dissolve rising fear and help you keep the ego in check.

So, in a fear-triggering situation, I would say, “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” to the person or incident. Then, I would allow myself to focus on and celebrate my friends and followers. To visualize my cheerleaders and see them multiply in my mind’s eyes.  And honestly, I know it to be truer than true that the people and situations that really get under my skin (and trigger me), have so much to teach me about ME… Talk about shining a big-ole spotlight on the broken parts inside of you that still need to be healed in order for you to reach your highest potential.

These people and situations also have a funny way of helping us become really clear on our desires! SO — yes, I really DO thank them. Because without them, without ever feeling uncomfortable, we would not grow the way in our soul desires for us to explore, expand and heal.

Before taking the leap from corporate work to soul alignment, I upped my gratitude game big-time. And my relationship with it has never been stronger.

Gratitude is the most powerful way to keep fear in the passenger’s seat. When you are grateful and living in a present state of gratitude, it’s impossible to simultaneously have fear.  

Here are 7 Ways I’m Working With Gratitude Daily

  1. Every single morning upon waking up, I say, “THANK YOU.” Then, I open my journal and write 10 or more people/experiences/things I’m grateful for and WHY. After I’m done writing, I go back and read through each one — out loud, if I can — and say, “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
  2. I read several prayers that feed my soul and work through my current affirmations, followed by a “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” after each one. These are all hanging on my vision board for easy access and reminders.
  3. I meditate daily, even if just for five minutes, because this keeps me grounded, connected, activated and present. When we are in the present moment, we cannot have fear. Fear and anxiety speak to us when we imagine a future that is not here or replay memories or upsets from the past.
  4. I say, “Thank you,” a lot throughout the day, to even little things (that are actually really big) like the chance to step outside and breathe in fresh air, my computer for working for me so tirelessly, my Internet for keeping up with my needs, my remedies that help me stay focused… all day, I’m giving thanks freely.
  5. I ring a bell, either a literal bell or an imaginary one, when I get a new client or a new opportunity that’s aligned with expansion,  or when a client’s win is shared with me — basically for anything that makes me feel giddy and that I want to receive more of.
  6. I sprinkle “magic dust” on all my meals and in my water as a way of expressing gratitude for my nourishment.
  7. Before bed each night, I express intentional gratitude. I hold a crystal that sits on the bed stand and I think back through my day. I find the best moment and hold that image as I say, “Thank you.” (I do this one with my kiddo.)

I truly feel “in the flow” right now, and while my fear about this newness and major life change is absolutely in me, I’m grateful that I’m here. In this moment. Writing this post and surrendering to this experience from a place of gratitude for the magic in my life and the magic that’s on its way.  

To fiercely expressing gratitude,


Inspired from “The Magic,” by Rhonda Byrne.